Supporting Your Child’s Social Learning

We all want our children to feel happy, confident, and connected with others. One of the most important parts of childhood is learning how to build and maintain friendships, manage emotions, and work well with peers. These are “social learning skills” and just like reading and maths, they are skills that can be taught, practised, and supported at home and school.

Social skills are closely linked with well-being and success at school. Children who can communicate clearly, manage big feelings, and solve problems with friends are more likely to enjoy school, engage in learning, and build strong, healthy relationships throughout life.

Ways We Can Support Social Learning

1. Model Positive Interactions
   
   Children learn by watching us engage in active listening, turn-taking, and respectful disagreements at home. Talking about these interactions and highlighting what went well will reinforce learning. 
   
   
2. Practice Everyday Skills
   
   Skills like sharing, waiting for a turn, or introducing yourself can be practised in low-stress settings at home — whether it’s board games, family meals, or playdates.
   
   
3. Coach, Don’t Rescue
   
   When children face friendship challenges, it can be tempting to step in and fix things quickly. Instead, try asking guiding questions: “What do you think you could say to your friend?” or “How else could you solve this problem?” This builds problem-solving and confidence.
   
   
4. Talk About Emotions
   
   Naming feelings, “I can see you’re frustrated because the game didn’t go your way”, helps children build emotional awareness and empathy for others. Making it clear that our expectations of behaviour are not dependent on emotion: “I know you’re angry, but it’s never OK to hurt people. Here’s what you can do when you’re angry”.
   
   
5. Encourage Team Activities

Sport, music, drama, and group projects provide natural opportunities for children to practise working together, negotiating roles, and supporting one another. 

It’s normal for children to have ups and downs with friendships. Conflict and challenges are inevitable and normal, but if you notice your child is regularly feeling left out, struggling to manage conflict, or avoiding social situations, don’t hesitate to reach out for support. We all want our children to feel confident and capable in their social world and see them ultimately grow into adults who are able to thrive. 

Fiona Harris
School Psychologist | Clinical Psychologist